


Hopeless

by AquaCitty



Category: Sanders Sides, Thomas Sanders, prinxiety - Fandom
Genre: Angst, Eventual Fluff, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Nonexistent updating schedule, Panic Attacks, Self Harm, first fic so idk what I’m doing, im sorry, just never followed, self hate, well it’s there
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-11-18
Updated: 2017-12-20
Packaged: 2019-02-04 00:26:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 4,514
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12759336
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AquaCitty/pseuds/AquaCitty
Summary: A voice has haunted Virgil for many years, it whispers words of hate in his ear everyday, and that’s okay, Virgil knows how to deal with it. But the others don’t. What happens when the voice decides to have some fun with the other sides, and is ready to dispose of Virgil to do it. (Ok that was cheesy, sorry. This is my first fan fiction, but I’m working hard on it so bear with me... and all the angst)





	1. The calm

**Author's Note:**

> Salutations. My name is Angie, and this is my first fic, so it might be a learning curve please bear with me. Yeah I’m not sure what else to write... enjoy I guess =). Also *trigger warnings*  
> Panic attacks  
> Self hate  
> Thoughts of suicide  
> (It’s going to be an angsty ride y’all >=D)

His heavy breaths scared him. Well to be honest what doesn’t scare him these days. This is the largest panic attack he’s had in a few months, he thought he’d made progress. A frustrated growl escaped from his lips. Why now, of all times, why now? Soon his eyes glazed over and the room faded into darkness. 

Virgil awoke to the angry cries of his alarm clock, piercing his skull. A sigh escaped him as he slowly lifted himself up to assess the damage. His clothes were drenched in sweat, and he realised he must have bitten his lip as he tried, in vain, to wipe off some of the blood on his chin. Virgil seemed content for the time being… or at least he wasn’t on the verge of an attack. Soon the young man stood, his body creaked and ached. He felt dirty, but dirty in such a way a simple shower could not help, yet he took one anyway. After he dried off and put on the same outfit he wore everyday, Virgil felt ready, or more ready at least, to face the day. Taking a shaking breath his hand twisted on a cold, dark doorknob and pushed open his creaky wooden door. Of course it was the creepiest door in the house, Virgil smirked to himself, although a pang of sadness did rise in his chest and his truly tortured expression took over, but just for a second, then his defensive smirk slid back onto his face, and just in time as Patton bounded over. Patton was Thomas’s moral side, he controlled Thomas’s happy emotions, and was almost always in an unnerving, and unwavering happy state.  
“Heya Kiddo! How are ya?” The childish parent asked, looking up at Anxiety.  
“F-fine…” Virgil stuttered, wavering under Patten’s unyielding stare. It wasn’t harsh or anything, in fact it had a strange comforting effect in the dark boy’s heart and mind. But suddenly Virgil came back to his senses. Idiot, he told himself, he hates you. Idiotidiotiditoidiotid- Virgil took a deep breath in.This is shaping up to be a long morning.  
\----------------------------------------------------------  
  
“So how about breakfast?” Patton asked , obviously concerned.  
 _Crapcrapcrapcrapcrap! He knows, he hates you, they all hate you. Crapcrapcrapcrapcrapcrap…_ A voice whispered in his head  
“Sure.” Virgil mustered a half smile, trying to fake an embarrassed, but happy guy.  
Patton bought it. His smile returned, radiant as ever. As Patton silently marches him to the commons area as Virgil silently thanks any godlike thing out there for inheriting his host's acting skills. He almost relaxed until he saw the others sitting quietly in their respective chairs, couches, or in Roman’s case, throne. Roman was Thomas’s creative side, he always had a flare for grand gestures (like thrones in the living room,) much to Virgil’s annoyance. More social interaction was not what the doctor ordered.  
“Hey Lo ... guess what?” Patton giggles distracted him.  
“What is it Patton?” Logan sighed, Logan was Thomas’s logical side. He was an overachieving, egotistical man. Virgil inched away from him quickly.  
“Did you see the new posters I put in my room?”  
“Well- no. Obviously not…” Logan coughed, flustered.  
“Well I personally think they’re just drop **dad** gorgeous.” Patton’s giggles become higher and more rapid, assaulting Virgil's already tired mind.  
“Drop **DAD** gorgeous… Ayy… Get it?” Patton squealed  
“Patton,” Logan struggled to keep his voice low… “Why must you ALWAYS use those gosh forsaken puns on me, you know they only worsen my mood.”  
“Aww, kiddo. Don’t be like that…” Patton looked downcast, “And I know you love ‘em” He added quietly, but loud enough for Logan to hear.  
The poor man turned a shade of a red close Princey’s sash. This earned many suppressed giggles from Patton. And even Roman, whom Virgil had completely forgotten was even in the same room, tried to keep in a laugh. Meanwhile Logan buried himself in sudoku.  
“Wassup Hot topic?” Roman lazily addressed Virgil with this overused line. Virgil tensed, the mere thought of Roman, scares him. Every night he dreams of the others beating him, hurting him, leaving him bleeding to death, and why shouldn’t they? They hated him, and he was made to be hated, but every night Roman is the one who finishes him off leaving a last fatal blow, causing such vivid pain, he wakes up crying. Every night. Yet Virgil had enough to worry about already, so he ignored the terror in his stomach and turned to towards the Prince.  
“Seriously?” Virgil sighed “That line again?”  
“Well, it certainly became popular with the viewers.” Princey contemplated, “Why shouldn’t I use it?”  
“I just- nothing... nevermind” Virgil mumbled. His thoughts too distracting to concentrate on a witty comeback.                  _They hate you, they want to kill you, you deserve it, nobody wants you, kill yourself, kill yourself, kill yourself..._ The voice got louder.

Fighting the urge to run back to his room, Virgil sits down in his chair in the far corner. It was black and uncomfortable, but Virgil didn’t mind too much. He’d accepted that everything he owns in Thomas’s mind is made so he suffers. That was his job, to suffer silently, so the others never had to. Patton bounds over to him with a plate of sugary pancakes.

_Great_ , Virgil thoughts scolded sarcastically, _more pancakes! I’m going to have to throw this up again…_  
A small nod of thanks was all the dark emotion could utter. He just wanted to go back to bed. But of course Logon had to pipe up.  
“So Anxiety,” Logon questioned, he had never really gotten used to the names, “ What are you doing up? Aren’t you usually moping around in your room about now.”  
Virgil could sense the condescending hostility wafting towards him from the other side of the room. Virgil was surprised, he expected this from Roman, perhaps even Patton, that guy always seemed too happy to him, but Logan had always kept his cool, never showing emotion. Even Princey and Morality looked up, surprised. Though soon the Prince’s shock turned into another condescending smirk, and Patton, Virgil’s only possible lifeline in this situation, turned around busying himself with cooking again.  
“Well, Loga- Logic… I thought coming here might help me, or Thomas, I’ll go if you don't want me to stay.” Virgil’s chest tightened, his heart race was up, he needed to get out of here before he had a meltdown on the spot.  
“No,” Logan said slowly, too slowly.  
Perhaps he could see the young boy squirming, wanting to prolong his misery, at least that’s the conclusion Virgil came to.  
“It’s just… Thomas had another anxiety attack today, I thought that might correlate with your new found confidence.” Logan’s voice was calm, but cold, cutting threw him like ice.  
Virgil knew what he was implying.

If Virgil was feeling like his life was threatened from any particular panic attack, he could shift some anxiety on to Thomas. The others laughed at this seemingly unnecessary precaution the first time they heard about it. Virgil has only used it once, a week before finals.

He couldn’t breathe, he banged his head repeatedly against the wall, until he hit a rusty nail. Blood poured down his face and his whole body felt like lead. He couldn’t breathe or think, blackness played at the ends of his vision. Until it was gone, his head wound healed, he could breathe normally, and he felt happy. That was until the other’s barged into his room. Thomas had fainted from hyperventilating, and the other emotions all turned against him. Virgil only realised he had used his power then, and he told the others apologetically. He can still remember the horror on their faces.

“I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry…” Virgil repeated over and over, softly crying.

Two of the persona’s left, leaving Logan there.

“Lo-Logic” He remembered pleading.

He also remeber the swift slap hitting him, square in the jaw, it stung like hell.

“Never. NEVER. Use that again. Die if that’s what it takes.” Logan’s voice terrified him, sometimes it still does, the pure anger and hatred toward Virgil terrified him.

Soon he decided that’s how they all felt about him, they hated him. 

And unknown to Virgil that’s when the voice grew stronger...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey so I hope you all enjoyed and if you didn't... um sorry I guess? So I hope to see you soon =)


	2. The storm

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Virgil just wants to be happy, but is it his job to be the villain?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey welcome back! Last episode we left our hero on the verge (Verge haha get it... sorry continuing) on a panic attack in front of the others, we also find out some of the shocking past between him and the other sides. Let’s see what happens next.  
> *trigger warnings*  
> Panic Attacks  
> Self hate  
> Suicidal thoughts  
> Seizures  
> Lots and lots of angst

Virge?” Patton was standing above him, he was on the floor. Wait, how did he get on the floor? “Virgil? Are you alright? I- I think you fainted…” Patton’s voice was soft, comforting.

“I’m fine” Virgil growled.

 _Idiot idiot idiot idiot idiot idiot idiot idiot,_ the voices chanted in his head.

Oh f*ck, his head, it pulsed, making the room spin. As got up he stumbled, almost falling until someone caught him. Roman. Virgil flinched violently as the Prince looked at him in confusion, and could that be concern? No Roman hated him, his mind was playing tricks.

“I said, I’m fine” The young man growled again.

He shoved off Princey and stumbled back to the hall. Logan looked up when Anxiety passed him, his brows creased, making Logan’s face look unusually mature. Once Virgil was sure he was out of sight he sprinted to his room. He stumbled into bathroom, everything was swaying, soon he was hunched over his toilet, heaving out what little breakfast he ate.

 _At least that’s over with_ , he thought to himself, wiping his mouth.

Then the reality of what just happened hit him. He fainted, in front of everyone. His thoughts attacked him again.

_Idiot. They’re probably laughing at you right now, just end your misery, they hate you, nobody will ever love you. Kill yourself, kill yourself, kill yourself, kill yourself, kill yourself…_

Tears quickly moistened his eyes. Suddenly sobs were racking his body. He covered his mouth in order to be quiet, the last thing he needed was for people to hear his misery. That was his job, he kept on telling himself, he had to suffer these emotions so the the others didn’t. Even if that meant he was hated, even if that meant he was the villain. He must of done something to deserve the eternal punishment. Everyday any insults, or hate comments, would be sent directly to him. And every night he would replay every failure Thomas ever made, over and over, until that nightmare was interrupted by another, mostly visions of the other beating him, or him accidentally killing Thomas. Virgil couldn’t live in a world that assigned him this torturous position for no reason so everyday he comes up with more reasons he deserves this. By now Virgil was completely trapped in his head, loud sobs escaped him, but no one came to his rescue, no one opened that door. So Virgil was left sobbing, in the bathroom, completely alone. Before he blacked out completely he whispered a wish.

“Someone please get me out of this hell.”

\----------------------------------------------------------

The next day Virgil assessed the damage again. His lips were dry and cracked, his eyes red and swollen. It was obvious he had been crying. As an added bonus Virgil felt a two large bumps on the back of his head one from fainting in the common room, and the other was from when he lost consciousness sometime last night. The clock showed it was 6:03 am. Virgil frowned, he had only gotten three hours of sleep per usual, yet he was feeling particularly… alive? Awake? He wasn’t really sure what to call it. Soon Virgil slipped out of his room, feeling little to no apprehension for the day ahead. He already knew that Logan would be in the kitchen, and Patton would join at around nine, then Roman would come “fashionably late” as the creative side like to put it, around eleven. Perhaps this was the root of Virgil slightly eerie calm, he had a plan, he knew what was going to happen…? Virgil quickened his pace to the kitchen, for some reason wishing to see Logan. Virgil slid into the kitchen grabbed a glass of OJ and walked over to the common area.

“Hey Nerd,” Virgil smirked, not looking at Logan, “How are y-”

Virgil gasped at what his saw. Losing all focus the glass smashed on the floor, orange liquid splashing on the floor. The glass rolled on the floor hitting Anxieties foot, Virgil woke from his trance.

“Logic!” He screamed, pure terror in his voice.

‘Logic! Answer me!!”

“Logan, please!”

\----------------------------------------------------------

Roman woke up to screams coming from the kitchen. Scenarios flew through his mind as racing to the source of the noise.

“Logan,please!” He heard Virgil’s voice, full of terror.

Roman raced faster joined by Patton some way down the hall. When he got to the common area he saw something that made his heart stop. Virgil was crouched besides Logan, tears flew down Anxieties cheeks as he shook the other man, I don’t think he even noticed our presence. Logan was on the floor, seizing up violently, his eyes were wide and unseeing, blood drooled down his chin, more coming up as he went into a coughing fit.

“Logan!” Patton’s cry woke up Roman from his stance.

Roman swooped in ready to be the hero, but found himself completely useless. Virgil looked up, eyes wide.

“Don’t just stand there!” He screamed

“I-I…” Roman stuttered.

Quickly Patton rushed in front of the Prince, his parental instincts kicking in.

“Virgil!” Patton shouted unnecessarily loudly “Help me get him on his side.”

Virgil and Patton slowly moved him onto his side, which was a hard task because every thirty seconds or so he would shake rapidly falling back to the floor, thought after some time and effort Logan was comfortably on his side, and he quickly he threw up.

 _Well that carpet’s ruined,_ Princey thought, but he felt instantaneously guilty, _not the thing to worry about right now_ he chastised himself _._

“Roman please clean that up.” Patton ordered without looking up, he was whispering something in Logic’s ear, while simultaneously rubbing circles on Virgil’s back trying to get him to calm down.

 _Don’t comfort Virgil_ He thought angrily at Patton, _Focus on Logan!_

Then it hit him what Patton had just asked him to do. He gagged and sheepishly wondered if there was any way out of it.

“Um Patton… perhaps I could-”He was cut off by the parents angry stare and sighed walking into the kitchen to get cleaning supplies, and perhaps something to plug his nose.

Meanwhile Virgil was in bad shape.

He was chanting incoherently and scraping his arm subconsciously, it was red, and bloody. Thankfully Patton noticed, trying to calm him down, as well as take care of Logan, the moral side wasn’t in great shape himself, but he knew the most important thing right now was to take care of the others, he could focus on himself later. Soon Roman walked in looking particularly disheveled as he attempted to clean up the contents of Logan’s stomach now resting on the floor.

Suddenly the Logical side stopped shaking and his breathing became regular. Patton and Roman lifted him up, and Patton carried the logical personality bridal style, to his room. Tears, for the first time since Patton saw Logan, threatened to fall. Meanwhile, in the common room, Roman was trying to make sense of these sudden events. Tears started threatening the creative side’s eyes as well. That was until he saw the purple and black heap on the floor.

“Virgil?” Roman’s fear came back with a vengeance.

The fanciful side stared down at Anxiety.

“Virge…? Buddy?” Roman voice sounded tearful, he couldn’t deal with this right now, not just after Logan’s fit… Roman gasped as he turned Virgil over.

His eyes were wide, unseeing, and silent sobs racked his body.

“What the hell is happening to you?” Roman asked to nobody in particular. Suddenly Virgil lost himself to the darkness completely, his eyes rolling into the back of his head.

“Virgil?!”

“Virgil!!”

“ **VIRGIL!!!** ”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oooh the plot thickens.  
> I know the first chapter has been up for less than a day, but I really wanted to continue this. Thanks for comments and kudos, they really made my day =D. Ok yeah if you want to keep reading I should upload again by the end of this week.
> 
> P.S it’s midnight and I have church super early in the morning... I’m so screwed....


	3. The other realm

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Logan wakes from his fit to an unknown voice invading his mind. He needs to get rid of this voice to help anxiety, but the voice weakens him. Will he have the strength to pull through for Virgil?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, welcome back =)! I actually kept on schedule for once which I am quite proud of, *pauses for applause* thank you, thank you. Just one quick note, I mentioned that Patton and Roman have corners in the commons, cause in my head cannon each of the sides had a corner even in the commons, though unlike in the physical plane they can come together or into each other’s corners. Alright I think that’s all, without further ado the next chapter of Hopeless.  
> *Trigger Warnings*  
> Self-hate  
> Suicidal thoughts  
> And as always lots of angst (I’m just evil that way)

Everything was blurry, and his head pounded. A blue and grey blob hovered over him.

“Pa-”  the man started to say, before devolving into a coughing fit.

“Hey, hey. It’s alright Logan you’re safe” Patton whispered, but it sounded like screaming in Logic’s ears.

Patton handed Logan a glass of water who gulped it down, fervently.

“There you go,” Patton smiled sweetly.

“What the hell happened.” Logan blurted out.

He was surprised when Patton didn’t correct his swear. Instead the parental figure eyes held a hint of sadness, a very unusual sight.

“Patton?” Logan’s voice held concern, another unusual occurrence. “What is… up?” Logan quoted from memory, his vocabulary cards finally coming in handy.

Patton sniffed, wiping a tear from his eye.

“I’m alright, you just scared me Logan.” his voice broke, “you scared me so much.”

“I apologize if my conduct was not pleasing for you. How should I change in future endeavors?” Logan offered, thoroughly confused.

“Oh my god Logan. No you didn’t do anything wrong!” Patton reassured the other quickly “…I just… do you remember anything?”

“... I don’t recall anything out of the ordinary happening… why what … happened?”

“Oh Lo… it- it was terrible… you were on the floor having some kind of… fit? I didn’t know how to help… and you were sick… and shaking… and Virgil was crying, even Roman was scared…”

Logan flinched at Patton’s mention of Virgil, he knew he should apologize to the anxious trait for scaring him… but he still felt guilty for his actions years ago, and it would be too hard for him.

_What a selfish bastard_ , a sudden voice shot through Logic’s mind.

“What…?” He whispered out loud.

Patton turned frowning again, “Did you say something?”

Logan considered telling the parent, until he realised how tired Morality really looked.

“It’s... nothing to… uh... concern yourself about…” Logan stuttered.

Patton usually would have pressed the matter, but he was feeling rather depleted of energy and not exactly his happy self right now. Once Morality closed the door Logan set his overworked mind to figuring out what that voice was.

_Selfish Bastard,_ the deep, distorted voice came again.

“Wha- Who are you?”

The voice laughed maniacally.

_And miss you trying to figure it out? No f*cking way_.

The swear was sharp and full of vengeance.

_You created me, you gave me life, so I must thank you. You gave me easy access to one of the sides. You let me dwell in him, hurt him, destroy him, and you did nothing, just gave me more reasons to thrive, to live, to kill. So thank you._

“What are you saying?” Logan voice cracked.

No answer

“Who are you talking about?” His whisper gaining volume

No answer

“What do you want?”

No answer

“Why aren’t you talking to me?!”

No answer

“... Who are you?” Logan asked once more

_Your worst nightmare._

That’s when Logan heard the screaming

\----------------------------------------------------------

A still rather disoriented Logan rushed to the living room, and saw Roman, and Patton standing over something Logan couldn’t quite make out.

What were they staring at…? Logic wondered, absentmindedly inching forward. That’s when he saw it.

It was Virgil.

He was on the floor, but unlike Logan he was completely still. Shallow breaths were the only indicator that he was still living. His eyes were open, but rolled back into the back of head, leaving his eyes wide, but completely white. His face was also whiter than Logan had ever seen. He heard Patton stifling sobs, and an unknown emotion filled his heart, for the first time in Logic’s life tears threatened to spill. Yet he was distracted by an all too familiar voice.

_Oops_

Logan stepped away from the others slowly.

“What did you do?” He hissed angrily

_Ooh is someone angry at me? I’m so scared_. The sarcastic voice came back, this time with more of an edge.

“We will everything we can to get away from you, to save Virgil. You’ll see” Another new emotion bubbles up in Logan.

He clenched his fists as he recognized the new emotion of anger.

_Well go on. Save him. Defeat me together, but you’ll have to tell the others about me first. Is that what you want? To burden them? To hurt them? They’ll hate you more than they do already._

“They don’t hate me.” Logan tried to make his voice sound confident, but failed miserably.

_Why don’t you just kill yourself, you let Thomas down. You pull him back, he was never interested in what you thought was best._

“No…” Logan whispered, fearful.

_I can feel you. Feel you crumbling, feel you losing hope. Breaking Virgil was fun, but breaking you will be so much better._

Logan surged up at the mention of the younger trait.

“I will never!” Logan’s voice shook with anger, he completely forgot about being quiet, “Never! Give you that satisfaction.”

_We’ll see_. The voice gave a curt laugh, dissolving from the logical sides thoughts.

Logan slumped over in relief, not realizing the strain that… that thing, had put on his already throbbing brain.

Meanwhile, Patton and Roman approached him carefully.

“...Lo…?” Patton questioned carefully, “You were kind of… screaming at… no one.” The moral side gave a short, hollow laugh, but there was no humor in it.

“Yes,” Logan started “I believe there is something I should disclose to you.”

\----------------------------------------------------------

Virgil woke up in pain.

A lot of pain.

His head throbbed so much it felt ready to crack, and his eyes burned. Virgil curled up, slightly whimpering, until his panic overwhelmed the pain. His neck cracked as he looked up. He was in the commons, but it didn’t look right. Everything was shaded with black hues, even the bright, and vibrant colors coming from Patton’s or Roman’s corners had faded dramatically.

“Hello” Virgil croaked, his voice weak from lack of use.

“Hello?” He called again, more desperate.

_They won’t hear you_

“Why can’t you leave me the f*ck alone!” Virgil whisper shouted at the all too familiar voice.

_Oh, I see you’re feeling cocky today._ It paused _Good, I’m going to enjoy crushing you today, give me some practice for Logan._

“L-Logan?” Virgil questioned, concern seeping into his voice.

_Oops_ , it let out a villainous cackle, _did I say that out loud?_

“Leave Logic alone. You’ve never wanted him before. Just take me.” His voice cracked at the last part, accepting his defeat.

_My, my. What a selfless hero._

Virgil flinched.

_You see as fun as it was to break you over and over and over. I got a little bored, you were too easy, already suffering from anxiety, and let’s face it, depression too. The others,_ it’s voice became sickeningly wistful, _oh they would be the challenge I wished for._

“Please” Virgil begged.

“Please, please, please, please, please, please” he repeated over and over, though he knew his effort would not come to anything.

It was heartless, it’s only incentive was to hunt, and destroy.

_Farewell anxiety._

“Wait.” Virgil quickly whispered, regretting the words instantly.

_Yes_? it hissed impatiently.

“Where am I?” Virgil asked slowly, looking again at the familiar, yet unfamiliar room.

_My realm,_ it stated matter of factly.

“W-w-what?” Virgil felt his stomach drop, this was so much worse than he had imagined.

He only knew stories of this place, and none of them had a happy ending. This was a place of suffering, of heartbreak, and endless pain. Oh god, he had had to get out of here, the others, this will hurt the others, and Thomas. Oh sh*t Thomas! He was supposed to protect him, but if the rumors are right about this place, he might not be able to do that for much longer. Virgil distantly heard an evil laugh, and felt the voice’s presence leave. Tears streamed down the young traits face. His breathing was fast and irregular.

“I don’t want to die.” He whispered, before passing out for the third time that week.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ayyy. I hope you enjoyed this chapter of Hopeless, and the cliffhanger at the end >=). Don’t worry I won’t kill off Virgil... or will I? Find out in the next chapter (shamless self-promo). But yeah I will upload again by the latest Sunday (if I don’t procrastinate like I usually do, but I’m really enjoying so hopefully I won’t...) . Alright have an amazing day... or night I guess. Well I’m officially rambling, so I wil say I final goodbye.


	4. The Hero

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Roman hears he voice next. What does it want? How will he react.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I’m alive! Its been a crazy month for me i dont even want to go into it, so I’m sorry this sooooooo late and sooooo short (and probably soooo bad). Also Roman’s personal thoughts are in bold, and the “voices” thoughts are italic.  
> -TW-  
> Self- hatred  
> General angst (you know this by now)

Roman paced the room quickly. His mind was spinning as he tried to process the new information.  
“So you’re saying that Virgil always had this… voice in his head, telling him he was… worthless?” Roman voice was laced with disbelief as well as guilt.  
He always thought Virgil’s sharp sarcasm was his humor, but it was a defensive mechanism, that Roman liked to push, to break through.  
**My god, how could you call yourself royalty, he thought spitefully, you let Virgil, your friend… your family, suffer for years.**  
Tears stung at his eyes. Virgil is barely breathing and it’s his fault, it’s all his fault. Virgil shouldn’t be the one to suffer, he should.  
“It should be me” Roman whispered out loud.  
Patton was by his side immediately, quietly reassuring him, but Roman couldn’t focus as a painful throbbing had started in his brain, it felt like his skull would break from the pressure.  
_Hey there Princey,_ the voice said… it almost sounded like Anxi- Virgil, but Roman knew who it was.  
“Guys it’s here!” He yelled.  
“What?! Where?” Patton looked around the room wildly.  
“No! Patton it’s not- oh my-“ Roman sighed, exasperated “Patton!” He yelled as the moral side moved around the room attempting to find the voice.  
Patton looked up.  
“He’s in my mind, not… behind the couch.” Roman hissed.  
“Sorry.” Patton asked sheepishly. “Are you alright?”  
_Are you alright? Interesting question there from Patton. You could lie, and say yes. I mean you’d be lying, but it’s nothing a brilliant actor like you couldn’t pull off._

Roman cursed himself for the sliver of pride that swelled in him at those word _._

_Or you could break his heart, and say no. I mean he’s been through so much today, Logans fit,_

Roman had almost forgotten about that, it felt like a millennia ago

 _Virgil’s panic attack_ ,

 **That was a panic attack?!** Roman thought guiltily, he overheard Virgil describing one once, it didn’t sound fun…

_Logan telling you about me…_

**Wait** _,_ Roman thought, **that’s right. He told us about you. He told us we could only work on this together only save Virgil as a team. I need to be honest, and Patton is tough, he can take it.** Roman finished confidentially.  
_If you say so._  
“No.” Roman said proudly  
“What?” Patton and Logan said simultaneously.  
“No, I-I’m not alright…” Roman confidence was shaken.  
“Oh my gosh Roman, not you too, b-but you’re the strongest of us all!” Patton’s face looked crestfallen, and he sobbed dramatically into Logans arm.  
“Roman!” Logan hissed, “you know how overemotional he gets in long-term stressful situations! Honestly, how stupid!”  
The voice started laughing maniacally.  
_Maybe this will be easier than I thought_.  
The voice disappeared, and Virgil twitched uncomfortably.  
“Oh Verge, I hate this, and I know you do too, but I’m going to save you. No matter what it takes.” Roman sighed, before laying down next to the younger man on the bed. Tonight he would sleep, and tomorrow he was determined to save the anxious side. He would be smart, and strong.  
_You’ll finally be the hero_.  
Roman smiled, **I’ll finally be the hero,** he thought.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok hope you enjoyed, I’m going to try to get back in the swing of things, so I’m going to aim for a new release before the new year! Merry Christmas/Any other holiday people celebrate!! 
> 
> P.S   
> Comments give me life, and I gladly accept any constructive criticism (just be nice)

**Author's Note:**

> So yeah there we go. I hoped you enjoyed, and if you didn’t... then sorry I guess? Ok we’ll have a nice day, and come back soon =)


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